Tofucken: The Vegan Turducken


Hello the internet today we’re going to make a vegan version of a Turducken or as it’s also known a tofucken so let’s get started A turducken is a chicken, stuffed inside a duck, stuffed inside a turkey which is probably the grossest shit i’ve ever heard of. Usually eaten by simple shit bags now our tofucken will start with some lovely tempe, chopped up small sauteed in olive oil with a little black pepper hmm and add a little soy sauce next we’ll stuff our tofu block with this lovely sauteed tempe next we take that beautiful block of tofu, we place it in our favorite marinade spoon a little up on the top this is gonna be the tits you know a perk of this recipe is that you don’t have to eat body parts and shit why some of those cooking show twats they even smile as they stuff bread up a bird’s ass isn’t that fucking strange and after your tofu has soaked up that delicious goddamn marinade then wrap it up in your favorite homemade seitan i make my own seitan because i have no time for weak ass bullshit then roast until it’s golden brown isn’t it nice to not be eating fucking corpses on today’s farms chickens. ducks, turkeys are totally fucked they’re raised in tiny ass sheds, and after a shitty life they have ass hats beating the crap out of them they’re fucking hung upside down their fucking throats are cut at a slaughter house which is nothing more than a dead torture palace if shit like that was done to dogs everyday people would be like Jesus fucking Christ you cock sucking animal abusing chodes so how are birds any fucking different in only the god damn ways that count feeling pain and fear and shit bitch please you know who eats like that weak ass motherfuckers that’s who so don’t be a weak ass motherfucker go vegan im gonna eat the fuck out of this

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